Who are the Miao?
The Miao minority group live in the mountainous areas of southern and southwestern China. They are called by westerners: Hmong. The Miao are famous for their beautiful handmade artworks like brocade, embroidery, batik, and silver ornaments. The Miao like to get together singing and dancing to enjoy life during holidays. While young people would use holidays to look for their mates.
Flirting
If a man shows interest in a girl, he will follow her and may suddenly give her finger a gentle pinch. If the girl has a good feeling about the man, she will look at him with a smile; or she just ignore him if she doesn’t like.
Some men can find an excuse like “asking for candy” to play with girls.” He will try to ask for some candy from a girl, and if she shows no interest, she will give a reply,” I have no candy anymore, go to ask somewhere else.” However if the girl does like the man, she would give a hint, “just go with me.” Then she goes away. The man now goes together with her to the woods or riverside to hold a talk.
Dating
When going on a date, Miao lovers have their own signs to indicate the place and time to meet. The one who arrives first will use a patch of tall grass to tie a knot and leave a special mark directing the other to the meeting place.
Each peculiar sign has a meaning. A bee made of couch grass means: I am waiting here, will you come? A dragonfly made out of a vanilla plant means: we will meet at the same place, please come soon! A grasshopper signifies: please forgive me, I can’t come to see you now. Grass braided together with a white flower shows: we don’t need to see each other anymore as you have never come to meet me on time.
When their partner arrives, she/he will tie another knot in the middle of the same patch of grass to tell others not to bother them.
After meeting a few times, the couple will exchange some of their private things as a keepsake. The girl gives the man her handkerchief or silver hair pin, while the man gives his waistband or other private things to the girl.
Marriage
When a Miao couple decides to get married, they will tell their parents, who then ask a matchmaker to fix the wedding date.
Sometimes an interesting thing will happen if the parents don’t agree. The man will bring some people to “break” the girl’s home at night to “kidnap” her and take her to his home. Three days later, the man’s family will send an old respectable family member with a chicken to inform the girl’s parents, and ask them to agree.
C. Liu is an expert of Miao culture, and she has published lots of articles about Miao history and culture. Occasionally she supports the work of certain Miao artists. Go to her website to learn more about Miao culture and see fine Miao silver jewelry here.
